I’ve never been a big one for New Year’s Resolutions. Once or twice I may have thought “new year, a few small changes” but they’ve then dropped off over time – of ten before the end of January – and I’ve never really felt I had a whole lot I wanted to change. Sure, I could stand to lose a little weight, do more exercise, drink a bit less etc. Who couldn’t? But I’ve never been one for life changin affirmations on New Yar’s Eve.
I’ve been reading a few articles recently that suggest the male side of a soon-to-be-parents couple will go through changes akin to nesting, just more, well, butch. We’ll grow a beard (check), try and turn our hands to manual labour (not so far) and generally ‘man up’ as we face up to our responsibilites. And of course we have this time to adjust.
I’ve also become noticeably more carpe diem…things I’ve not done are suddenly more important to me. I’m off to Reading festival having never been to a festival before…or at least not one of the ‘big’ festivals. I made a round trip from the North West to London & back to see Blur. I’ve started blogging (as you can see). I am getting through media with the sort of appetite that Goldilocks reserved for only the optimum temperature porridge – be it books, graphic novels (ok comics), albums, dvds etc etc.
All of this is transparently down to the ticking of a rather obvious clock. While I try to consume, digest and consume more, it’s my wife’s stomach that’s getting larger in some weird Dorian Gray trade-off. But here lies the issue. I’ve been given my nine months diagnosis (now down to three). So I get to plan one more big weekend (well, maybe a couple). And I can do it safe in the knowledge that it’s one of that few chances I’ll get between now and ooh 2029 by which time I’ll be far too old to be in a nightclub that isn’t called something like The Ritzy or The Coconut Grove or Duke’s.
And I don’t begrudge it for a second because I’m getting it out of my system, doing a few last things before my life changes dramatically. And changes in a way I wouldn’t swap for a thousand more nights out.
But here is the real rub – while I got notice, mummy didn’t. In fact for mum the whole stop notice was served without any soft soaping or by your leave. It arrived in the form of a positive pregnancy test and the immediate onset of morning sickness and cravings.
So it’s now also really important that we spend time together as a couple. All those things that really won’t be possible in a few months time. Lying in, going for dinner, getting coffee or lunch together. And I need to make sure the balance is right between us having our own individual space to prepare ourselves for November and doing things as a couple.